They say that your 20s are the best years of your life. The 20s are often portrayed as the chapter titled, “The Golden Years” — a time of youthful exuberance, experimenting with all aspects of life and endless possibilities. We lack the attachments that hold us down and have an abundance of naivety about world experiences. Maybe when I look back on this time in my life when I’m older, I’ll agree, but at this moment, I can’t disagree anymore. The beginning of this decade in my life has been marked by uncertainty, confusion and a profound sense of feeling lost. I recently turned 22 and will graduate this May with a bachelor’s in strategic communication and a double minor in interdisciplinary design and fashion studies.

With no job lined up.

“That’s okay! I’m sure something will come up!” 

“It’ll work out!” 

“You’re so young, things will figure themselves out!” 

That is what I usually hear when I bring up concerns about what will happen after graduation. In my senior year, the transition from adolescence to adulthood felt most present. The reality of becoming an adult with a “big girl job” set in as I anxiously and actively searched for internships and entry-level positions post-graduation. The once clear path laid out before me began to blue, leaving me in a fog of confusion. It’s funny because I feel like I need to do it all but I should also rest. I’m an adult but I need help from an adult. I’ve done so much but I’ve done nothing. I can do what I want but it feels like I’m being limited.

Don’t get me wrong, I still enjoy being in my 20s! I gained a sense of freedom, navigated my identity, formed a stronger relationship with myself and found family in friends. I’ve grown a lot of confidence in myself and would not change a thing about how I got here. Most of my frustrations and confusions lay with the greatest challenge of being in your 20s: the nagging pressure to have it all figured out. Although the comforting words from others tell me it’s okay to not have it figured out, there is an unspoken truth that follows me like an incessant fly. In this age of growing pains, we tend to compare our journey to the highlights of others. And trust me, it did not get easier with time due to the integration of social media and LinkedIn (it’s a love-hate relationship). 

At the ripe age of 22, I’m lost in a lot of aspects of my life but I can also feel confident in a lot of them too. I’m learning that this golden age is nuanced and nonlinear. The truth of being in your 20s is that you will be learning, failing and celebrating each day. The discomfort is new but I should revel and learn from it. Although I’ve only been in my 20s for two years, I have become a new person each year, carrying my losses and wins with me. The 20s are not the whole book but rather a chapter in my life. Today just happens to be another page.